Saturday, November 20, 2010 in

Thanks


November is such a beautiful time of year. It’s the time when people come together. Whether it’s because of the holidays, time off work or school, or just bitching about the cold weather. Either way people always seem more friendly in the colder months.

Plus, November is the start of the holiday season. Stores are gearing up for Christmas shopping sprees and grocery stores are stocking up on holiday cookies and eggnog. But maybe my favorite part is the Christmas music.

It’s not that I want to listen to Britney croaking out My Only Wish or Mariah Carey’s overly impassioned All I want for Christmas is You, it’s that I have to. There’s just something about the unabashed, suggestive, Christmas music that puts me in the Holiday spirit.
The true essence of Christmas (in CD form)

After Thanksgiving my car radio stays on the 24 hour Christmas station.
No matter what.
You want to change the station? I hope you like walking.

Thanksgiving is such a strange holiday. Don’t get me wrong, I love every second of it. I mean what could be better? All you do is sit around with family and friends and eat a bunch of comfort food all day. It’s like the one time of year where you won’t get judged for being a total glutton. Don’t quote me on this, but I’m pretty sure it says that in the bible.

While Thanksgiving will always have a special place in my heart, there is one negative thought that plagues my mind year after year. Let me set the scene for you.

Past Thanksgivings between 2004-2009:

I’m home for the Thanksgiving holiday to spend a brief couple of days with my family. On Thanksgiving morning I wake up and help my parents get the meal ready. While watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, we set the beautiful table that my mom decorated days in advance.
Even Martha would be jealous
We’re no Norman Rockwell painting but it’s still a nice family gathering.

As I sit down at this beautiful table, smell all the comforting food, I look at my lovely family and their smiling faces, I can’t help but picture this:
Yes, that is the gluttony scene from the movie Seven, in which a man is forced to feed himself until he literally bursts. It's so strange because usually if Brad Pitt is in a movie all I think about is how good his hair must smell, but not this movie. This movie has had a strange pull on my mind, particularly this gluttony scene.

Just when I couldn’t imagine how this horrible image of a large man slumped over, face- planting into a bowl of spaghetti could get any more vivid in my mind, it does. As people reach for second helpings and start bringing pies to the table, there is always someone that says, “I ate so much, I think I’m about to burst!”

This is usually the time I reach for another glass of wine.

Later in the day as everyone is sleeping in their turkey coma (and I’ve checked all their pulses), I try to distract my horrified mind by watching the news. After seeing which local redneck tried to deep fried the turkey in his garage this year, I start to feel a little better and remember all the things I have to be thankful for.

Like not having a family that plays horse shoes with toilet seats.

If you are spending the holiday with friends or family you might want to check out this website to avoid any Thanksgiving Day blunders. And to cleanse your mental palette:
Happy Thanksgiving

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