You Are At The Archives for May 2011

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Time has Come

At the end of this month I will be officially be in my mid twenties and entering the 25-35 age bracket. From now on I will be able to rent a car and make it rain with all the money I’ll save from the lower car insurance. What an exciting time in my life.

The thing is, I’m having a little bit of trouble dealing with the fact I’m turning 25. It’s not that 25 is old or anything but it seems like this is the age when you should know how to navigate through life. Maybe not easily but at least in a “I didn’t get lost driving home from the grocery store” kind of way.

I’ve been spending the last few days searching the internet for some kind of encouraging news or success stories about turning 25. You know, like “The year I turned 25 was the best year of my life! I got an awesome job, a beautiful spouse, an incredible home and David Byrne seems to be writing a song about my life.” 
How did you get a beautiful home and a beautiful wife with that suit jacket?
But all I can find are these articles explaining how more and more 25 year olds are having a quarter life crisis, while others are just trying to keep a grasp on their kegger days. These findings were a little less encouraging and a little more pitiful than what I was expecting.

Actually I wish I wouldn’t have started snooping around on the internet because it didn’t make me feel any better. It just helped make my mental dialogue more colorful: “You're a quarter of a century old!” or “You’re half way to fifty!” The internet always seems to have this negative effect on me. Like all those times I tried to self diagnose with WebMD and thought I had scurvy or tyrotoxism (poisoning by cheese).
probably cancer
Getting older has never bothered me in the past. Well, last years birthday was a little strange. I seemed to have forgotten that I was 23 turning 24 and instead thought I was 22 turning 23. It was all very confusing and I still feel as though someone stole a year of my life. Similar to how I felt during the credits of 2 Fast and 2 Furious.
I've just sucked one year of your life away
But normally I don’t even think about my age and I have several interesting and inspiring older role models that make getting older seem graceful and exciting (The only one that comes to mind at the moment is Auntie Mame. Probably not a good sign). So why is it 25 seems to be bothering me so much? Who knows? I’m sure I’ll deal with on a couch someday but for now I've been self medicating with Queen.

Thursday, May 19, 2011 in , ,

Silent Spring

Spring through pictures (and some explanation):
Springtime at the Capital

A sticker on my landlords door
Parking ticket



Art on the sidewalk
Art Display: Hide and Go Seek by Christopher Murphy
It glows in the dark

Attacked by a drunk dancer in heels
Antique Store find...
gave me nightmares

Tuesday, May 10, 2011 in ,

Rain and Sugar Gliders

Sleep aid?
 Spring, the season of renewal and the transition from the snowy, frigid temperatures of winter to the sunny skies of Summer. All winter long people look forward to Spring and it’s promise of warmer temperatures and blue skies. Everything is blooming including budding spring romances. What is there to not like about Spring?

I hate Spring.
Hate is probably too strong of a word but Spring is definitely not my favorite season. I think Negative Nancy has arrived:

It’s May and April showers have come and are apparently overstaying their welcome into the flower month.
Getting greener

While everyone is hustling through the days of dreary weather in their rain boots and sturdy umbrellas, seemingly unscathed, I’m fighting my own personal weather hell.

Rain. What's good about it? Oh sure all you lovers of Spring claim the rain and thunderstorms are romantic or poetic...

But let's get real. Not only does it mess up your hair, unless you’re one of those people that always looks good with tousled, rain drenched hair (in which case, don’t let my ranting disturb you from finding a fan, a spray on tan and a spread in the next Vogue magazine), but it also gives you soggy socks. No one likes soggy socks.
End of Spring Rant.

The arrival of Spring has also renewed my urge to get a pet and it doesn't help that the people of Madison love their dogs. I've wanted a dog for months if not years. I would be such a great dog owner! However, with my current living situation (you know... cozy?) and for that matter, my current employment status, getting a dog would be irresponsible if not bridging on animal cruelty. 

So I started researching what kind of animals would fit into a 240 sq ft apartment. At first the results seemed pretty slim with suggestions of fish, hamsters, ferrets, and potbelly pig, all of which sounded pretty smelly and well... kind of gross. Until I came across the Sugar Glider.

The Sugar glider is an exotic pet that might seem ideal for small apartments. It's fuzzy, cute, odorless and it can fly. I was so excited! Finally after years of waiting I was finally going to get a cute, fuzzy, little animal! I eagerly started researching my new precious pet.

My excitement soon turned to dismay and ended with repulsion as I stumbled across a website that listed all the drawbacks to being a Sugar Glider owner. "How could this adorable animal possibly have any drawbacks?" I naively thought to myself as I skimmed the extensive list. Soon, I was sitting in shocked disbelief. I looked the animal up on youtube trying to find anything to discredit these horrible findings.
Stop looking so innocent
Unfortunately, video after video listed all the same poor character traits. Let me try to briefly summarize. Sugar Gliders are noisy animals that love to bark, hiss and will often use their cages to make as much racket as possible. Oh yeah, they're also nocturnal animals and they plan on you being one also. Moving on to their biting habits. Since Sugar Gliders are exotic wild animals, in their natural habitat they peel the bark off trees which makes your fingers child's play to their razor sharp teeth. They are known biters and often a cause for stitches. Appalled and disappointed? I'm not finished yet.

Sugar Gliders cannot be litter or cage trained. Since they also love to climb and mark their territory, you should cover everything near it's cage because it will most likely urinate on it. It is common for the animal to relieve itself while it's eating, outside the cage or even while you're holding it. Also, much like a monkey, when it's bored or angry it is known for throwing it's food or it's own waste outside of the cage. 
oh not in the drinking cup...

Needless to say, I will not be getting a Sugar Glider. I guess I'll just stick with plants for now.
Brown? damn

Thursday, May 5, 2011 in

You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here

It’s Springtime in Wisconsin. April showers, May flowers, and the end of another school year has summer lovin' calling my name. It’s a bittersweet time of year. It always leaves me feeling relieved that I once again didn’t fail out of school and sad that I will have to say goodbye to new friends that are moving on to bigger and better things. But really, who likes saying goodbye?


Today was my last day of classes, maybe forever. Let’s get dramatic for a few minutes. I’ve been at a University for seven years in three different states. It’s the end of an era for me. I’ve made great friends, a few enemies, met lasting mentors and hopefully retained some things I won’t forget the next time I fall down a hill in a pair of hooker heels.

I’ve never liked endings. It doesn’t matter what it is: books, movies, school years, road trips.  I’m always sad to see anything come to an end even if I hate, resented, or complained about it the entire time. Even the humiliating semester in middle school when I was in choir and forced to sing hits like “Yellow Polka dot Bikini” and “Purple People Eater.” Yet, it still ended with doleful goodbyes and left me with a surprising feeling of sadness.
Exception: End of Hammer Pants. Not sad.

 So, what's next? For perhaps the first time in my life, I'm not completely sure. And honestly, I'm OK with that. I have some ideas for the next year but really it could go one of two ways: success or total failure. Any sane person living my life at this moment would be scared but I think it's all about how you measure success. As long as I don't plummet into life of prostitution, drugs or crime, I'm going to label it as a success.

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